Hollywood,Me and the romance!

It all started in a late spring of 1987, a Saturday!

As a small town 8 year old kid, I haven't much to do at weekends, except to feed the Chidambaram Natarajar temple tank fish , with 'pori' or if lucky to tune into a radio station for the hardly understandable hindi live commentry of some cricket match!

My father, for a change, took me to the chidambaram 'Vaduganathan ' theatre showing an english movie called 'Two policemen',an out and out comedy(I searched the whole net to collect data about this movie,but in vain.. It seems this movie has just disappeared from the records)

They use to show english movies ,only at weekends and only in the morning shows...

Anyway, it's  a love at second sight!

After a while,I accompanied my dad to another movie named 'King solomen mines'... to my kid's eyes, that movie seemed to be a magnonimous magic,in every way (it's hard to digest the harsh reviews at IMDB on my first love)!

I was as curious as that lion watching 'Richard Chamberlain' kissing 'Sharon Stone',inside that huge tumbled canniabal's pot!

I had fallen in love with my head over my heal, my heal over my hand ,and my hand over my head... with Hollywood!

Then I used to nudge my dad at weekends,as I am my dad's apple in the eye he had no other choice to heed to his darling son!

Great movies back to back...'The protector'(later I learned it was jackie chan's first hollywood film),'The legend of Bruce Lee',etc

But my romance then was too brief...

As usual I went with my dad to the movie 'The Ghost busters'... but it had some scenes not appropriate to my age, and the also showed the trailer of forth coming movie 'Gremlins' which again not suitable to a pure good kid, like me(?)!

I remember still... I was crying, stamping,protesting the next saturday, but my father adamantly refused to take me to that movie!

I thrown all my kiddish curses on my dad... as a reward for my great behaviour, he stopped taking me to movies then!

And 10 years latter, I took my father to a movie called 'Titanic' at Maruthi theatre,coimbatore!

Rose wanted Jack to paint her with the diamond... with the diamond only!

I wanted to say to my dad,"Iam a man now, dad... and no reason to stop my romance here after"

who is that man with blue turban?

The whole school at Avignon was talking about the mad boy who challenged the Copernican theory and said that the earth was revolving around the sun!

The whole Montpellier college of medicine was talking about the student who finished his bachelors in just three years!

The whole Marseilles town was talking about the physician who miraculously saved most men from fatal disease "le charbon"(plague)!

The whole France was talking about him when their king Henry 2 died exactly as he predicted , his eye was pierced by a lance in a friendly fight!

And the whole world was talking about him for past 400 years!

But why am I talking about him?

There was also an heated argument that he had predicted the twin tower attack.

But, I am a bit fascinated by that man with blue turban, coming again and again in his quatrains and most fascinating of them is the following.

Just for fun I superimposed. Don't take it serious!

  


La teste bleu fera la tete blanche

(the blue leader will inflict on white leader)

autant de mal que france a faict leur bien

(as much damage as France has done them good)

mort a lanthene grand pendu sus la branche

(death from antenna hanging from the branch)

quand prins des siens le roy dira combien

(when the king asks how many of his men have captured)

First one is pretty clear man with blue turban will beat man with the white one who has the support of France.

Some say the that blue men are UN soldiers(they do wear blue helmets)

and others wildly (really wild!) guess it is our own PM (ya.. regarding turban , an exact match)

And in other quatrain he says a man from the land where three water bodies meet, having Thursday as his holy day, whose praise will cross all lands and seas bringing trouble to the east!!!

I don't know what's the holy day for our PM... but this is interesting, out of three we can rule out two, as one has Sunday and other has Friday as holy!!!

He himself said approximately 400 hundred years afterwards one man intelligent enough to decipher all my sayings will appear!

I have this strong feeling that this man mentioned is my contemporary.

Hey man! where ever you are .. do your job quickly

I want to know who is that man with blue turban?

                                                              A Tuareg man

The Tuareg are a people who inhabit the Sahara desert, relying on camel nomadism. They are sometimes called the "Blue People" because the indigo pigment in the cloth of their traditional robes and turbans stains the wearer's skin dark blue.

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1.High noon

When I first met Sachin Tendulkar....

I was 10 years old kid when I first met Sachin Tendulkar (actually he was sixteen years old kid then)

1989!

Venue: The living hall!

To be exact: The black and white videocon T.V in the living hall, showing an exhibition match played between India and pakistan ( to be more exact, in Peshawar).

The kid (;) me ) was disappointed that a 50 overs official game was truncated to a 20 overs exhibition match due to bad light.

India was chasing 157. In those days India rarely won against pakistan, each victory was hailed as miracle!

Indian captain Srikanth had already lost hope of winning (Task was too daunting ... 69 runs of 5 overs) and was playing too playfully as it was an exhibition match!

Then a small kid entered the stadium. I had never seen this kid before. I thought he was from Assam Ranji team, may be his facial appearance would have misguided me ( And also my confident knowledgeable sister was affirming the fact that he was from Assam, hence no doubt raised what so ever!)

The Kid was two and a half times taller than the bat he was holding and somewhat taller than the stumps!

Curly curly hair, barely no mush, unique boyish stance and an exuberant confidence as if he already had fifty test centuries in his bag ( who would have thought eventually he would?)

Within few minutes after the kid took the crease,  the confident (as he was having already two wickets in his back pockets) Mustaq Ahamed's (another somewhat chubby kid little older than Tendulkar) couple of spinning balls vanished in some black hole among the spectators. Whole jubilant Pakistan crowd was stunned along with the Indian skipper Srikanth at the other end , wondering... "hey kid! who coached you, nobody plays such shots in India currently ... of course, except me occasionally!"

Then came the deadly Abdul Qadir. Deadly! yeah truly... his records against Indians would prove the justice of the chosen adjective. I didn't know what mesmerized and bamboozled India batsmen, whether his unique dancing way of reaching the crease or his ever spinning balls' treacherous way of trespassing our bats men's Indian Gate (better we could call it 'gateway') defense!

But Qadir might avoided saying those words to terrify the kid . After all that was not necessary, after all that was fate... entry of a great star should have some dramatic element, hence it would become an interesting legendary tale that would pass on from generation to generation along with the hard earned (hardly spent)and saved movable and immovable properties.

Those words are "Bachchon ko kyon mar rahe ho? Hamein bhi maar dikhao"

(" why are you hitting the kids ? Hit me too!)

What he said was like ... spending your own money to do black magic against yourself and also like... taking the crawling chameleon on the wall and putting it under your dhothi! ( you have to be a Tamilian to admire the intricacies of these wise-word comparisons)

Thats what the Kid did... hit him hard!

The over read like below...

Bang, silence, slash, bang, bang, bang!

6,o,4,6,6,6!

Everybody who witnessed the over gasped ! The young Kid on its first outing for hunting , was tearing down a lion to pieces. This would happen only in fairy tales named like " Nanarnia and Nine Shrek dwarfs " or something like that.

But it had really happened !

The worst over of Qadir in his career ( fortunately the match was not official) had been the launch pad the most powerful Indian Intercontinental Ballistic Missile named Sachin!

At last  the equation tuned out to be 4 out of one ball, but the kid couldn't make it and scrambled for one.

 (Even Srikanth was charged up, after seeing the Kid's blitzkrieg and was sprinting like hare on fire, running even for slightest misfieldings)

But it was a victory, neither the crowd nor the Pakistan rejoiced, after all rejoicing is not what you do when you are shocked!

How to master anger?

I was so angry... and I could see my own face glowing in tomato red , as if all the body's blood flow had been redirected to my face to flame up its anger further!

As shown in old Tamil black and white movies , my own mirror image started impersonating my mind (anyway whats the exact English word for manasatchi?) and started asking questions.

Me In the Mirror (MIM) : Hey! why are you so angry?

Me:(almost yelling!): If I know that, why should I be angry this much ?

MIM : Relax! Relax! Tone down your anger... I think, you know anger is the most harmful emotion to our body... just calm down!

Me : "Just calm down "... the most idiotic phrase, in mounting rage nobody would 'just' calm down... instead of telling "just" , just tell me what to do with this anger?

MIM (getting anxious on seeing my mounting rage): Bottled emotions are toxic... let your anger out!

Me: (making a fist of my right hand) I am going to let out my anger by smashing your face!

MIM : plz... no ... I am you! ... remember that!

Me : If you are me just answer me... how to master my anger?... in ten seconds you have to say me!
Or I am going to smash your face along with this mirror!

MIM : (starts fidgeting) Don't do that... let me think...

Me : 10,9,8,7...

MIM ; just give me some time space...

Me : 6,5,4,3,...

MIM : oh god save me from myself!

Me : 2, 1 , 0 ( I raised my fist)

MIM: Remember Seneca! Remember Seneca! ( screaming on top of the throat)

Me: Seneca! ( I stopped)

MIM : Yes.. his three step methodology

1. How to avoid becoming angry in the first place!

2. How to cease being angry!

3. How to deal with anger in others!

Me: Elaborate!

MIM: Seneca says,  "To avoid becoming angry in the first place, many faults of anger should be repeatedly remembered".

Me: Then!

MIM: "One should avoid being too busy or deal with anger-provoking people. Unnecessary hunger or thirst should be avoided and soothing music be listened to".

Me: To cease being angry?

MIM: "one to check speech and impulses and be aware of particular sources of personal irritation".

Me: In dealing with other people's anger?

MIM: One should not be too inquisitive: It is not always soothing to hear and see everything. When someone appears to slight you, you should be at first reluctant to believe this, and should wait to hear the full story. You should also put yourself in the place of the other person, trying to understand his motives and any extenuating factors, such as age or illness.

Me: What else he says about mastering anger?

MIM:  To put it simple he says just remember three things...

No 1: Daily self-inquisition about one's bad habit.
No 2: Check yourself when you are angry... your thought and behavior may not be rational.
No 3:  To deal with anger in others, Seneca suggests that the best reaction is to simply keep calm. A certain kind of deception, Seneca says, is necessary in dealing with angry people.

Me : mmmm... sounds good!

MIM( with a huge sigh): Whenever you got angry, just remember to remember the phrase "Remember Seneca" ... surely the phrase saved me from getting smashed by myself... it could save you from yourself too ( it winked at me with a meaningful smile... and vanished along with my anger)

Remember Seneca! 

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Do elephants swim?

We assume lot of things unconsciously ,without giving it a second thinking. Like that I assumed ,elephants are not good swimmers, may be their gigantic size would have misled my belief system.

But while watching the movie 'The fall' I had a divine revelation that actually these 3000 kilo beings could swim better than 50 kg Homo Sapien beauties. In the movie the elephant  helps a bunch of heroes to escape from a butterfly shaped island. The scene where the elephant swims has been extraordinarily shot (hats off to the film crew) , just seeing it gives you a spritual experience in admiration of its aesthetics in swimming.

The reason for their tireless and better swimming abilities are due to the fact that they use their trunks as snorkels. Actually before Hanuman had swam across the sea to Sri Lanka, it seems that some Elephant herds  had swam to there and settled there. (actually had grown slightly bigger than their own ancestral Indian counter parts in course of time).

As elephants are being good swimmers Andhamanese use the elephants to transport goods (especially logs) across the islands through sea.

I have seen Lord Ganesha in different forms, but I haven't seen so far a swimming Ganesha. Have you?